Public apology

[Chris Randall Magic]

I would like to publicly apologize to the magic community. Since FISM I have lashed out and been in a manner if words been an [censored]. I lashed out against the Magic Castle, Mr Kaufman, and many in
the magic community. This was only out of being self centered and non aware. I deeply apologize for my actions. It was aweful and most of all stupid on my part. The magic community has done nothing but showed me love and support and when I didn’t get my way at fism I acted like a child and hurt the people I love the most. I have seeked help and most of all I have learned by my stupid ways. I deeply apologize to Richard Kaufman and the entire magic community for my recent outbursts. The outbursts were highly childish and uncalled for and I’m very very sorry. Joe Furlow, Jack Goldfinger, Max Maven and the entire magic castle staff and again the magic community has been nothing short of being amazing to me for years and sadly in return I acted like an idiot and I’m very sorry. If the magic community will please accept me back I would please love to come back to the family. I’m very sorry and will do anything to make it up to all of you.

[Richard Kaufman]

Thanks, Chris. Most of us who behave stupidly when we're young eventually reach a breaking point and either we straighten out or drop out.
I accept your apology.
Please drop me a note at moobooks@verizon.net and we can chat more.

[Chris Randall Magic]

Thank you sir for being kind and forgiving

[Dustin Stinett]

Chris,
Are you able to post this on the AMA Facebook site? If not, let me know and I will do it for you.
Dustin

[Chris Randall Magic]

That would be nice Dustin.

[Chris Randall Magic]

FYI Dustin I’m not sure if you remember but I had some nice moments with you in the castle library visiting my buddy William Goodwin. Please send him my love next time you see him.

[Dustin Stinett]

I've posted in the AMA FB page. I have little recollection of meeting you, but I certainly will say hi to Bill for you.
Best wishes to you.

[Chris Randall Magic]

Thank you for posting that for me.

[KirkG]

Hey Chris

Good to hear you are getting it together. Keep on keeping on.

Kirk

[Chris Randall Magic]

Thanks Kirk nice hearing from you. It hasn’t been easy but very necessary. I only pray that my honesty even though very scary will inspire other to speak out instead of taking horrible measures like Daryl, Tim Conover, and Leeman. Magic has suffered bad loses and doesn’t need anymore. Honestly I attempted to end it years ago but Penn Jillete and Eric Mead reached out to me and instead of ending it they saved my life and let me know that I had an ear to listen to and that someone cared. Magic is a very special community and is a brotherhood or sisterhood and one I am proud to be a part of.

[Ray J]

Suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem. Never, ever a good idea. Help is always available. Glad to hear you are well!

[Chris Randall Magic]

I realized that after having the police show up at my house and seeing the pain in my mothers eyes and the embarrassment I felt. Then 2 years later I spoke to my buddy Daryl the day he passed and saw all the pain and questions that he left his friends and family. Mr Eric Mead in my worst moments was always there to listen and and give me a lending ear. He is writing a book about the amazing Tim Conover. I was lucky enough to reach out and make it aware that I was in pain. I receached out to Scott Alexander,,Levent and Shawn Farquhar for help and thankfully I got the help I needed. The Magic community is exactly that and there are ears out there and speaking up is better than the alternative.. For me I sadly picked self medicating with alcohol which lead to horrible results. Reach out to friends and family instead of self medicating and running and hiding like I did for years. This next part of my life is very hard but it’s better than what I was doing. I wish everyone hope, love and happiness, and if your ever scared, sad or insecure there is help out there and it’s free. And lastly we are a brother/sister hood of magic and since I have put my heart out there this week I have received floods of emails of love and support and that it why I’m a magician. My email is chrisrandallmagic@gmail.com and my ear is always open as the amazing magic community has been to me.

[Alfred]

After reading the posts in this thread, I recall what Arturo de Ascanio said many years ago. If memory serves me well, it was during a homage to Arturo that he addressed (or maybe was directly asked to do so) the young magicians saying:
«Youngsters are the future of magic. And if I were to give only one piece of advice to them, I would tell them that life is even more important than magic»

This made a lasting impression on me that elevated Arturo far above the «maestro» category.

I just thought it was appropriate and also related to the subject of this thread.

[Richard Kaufman]

I want to thank Chris for speaking publicly about these issues and we all wish him well. He can be reached at his email in the preceding message. Thanks!