You might be a magician if
Your best pickup line is "Pick a card."
You are in the ladies section of shops waving silks up and down to see how they move.
You tell bad jokes 75% of the time.
You pay $50 for a $1 coin.
A "shell" is not something found on a beach.
You think David Blaine sucks (cmon how true is this!!!).
You wont play card games with your cards.
Your girlfriend knows the sound of riffled cards over the phone.
You force your wife to take fertility drugs, so you can do those illusions that use twins....
You see a beautiful woman and think if she will suit your act.
While watching a movie or TV, you have cards in your hands.
You pose for a photo with one eyebrow raised!
You know who Brad Christian is and you always wonder if hes gay or not.
Your Christmas/Birthday wish list looks like a magic catalogue.
If you've ever been asked the question "can you make my wife disappear"?
Magic turns you on more than women do.
Youre back-ordered for rabbits and doves at the pet store.
You spend more time in front of a mirror than your girlfriend does.
Your twin boys are named Siegfried and Roy.
You use the word "effect" rather than "trick".
You drive 300 miles round trip to visit a teeney-tiny store.
You have over 100 responses to the phrase "How did you do that?"
Theres a pack of cards in sight as you read these words.
You're holding a fan of cards in every photo that you're in.
You actually want to go to a lecture.
You have a dog named "Houdini".
You record every magic special on TV.
You show your girlfriend the same trick everyday insisting that "I've improved it greatly".
You wear playing card pajamas.
You get emotional when shuffling a new deck. (So true!)
Anytime you see someone you want to meet, you start rolling a coin or doing one-handed shuffles with a deck.
You have more than three decks of cards on you at any given time.
You are the only one of your male friends that has a nice "silk collection".
You introduce your wife as "My assistant."
You wear black on the Anniversary of Houdini's death.
No one will play cards with you....ever.
Your idea of the perfect proposal is Copperfields 'Rose to Ring'
All your friends call you when magic is on TV.
You have more decks of cards than a casino.
The post office calls to tell you that you have ANOTHER package in.
You are laughing at these, because you actually know what they mean.
Your entire friends name starts with "The Amazing" or "The Great".
After viewing magic on TV, everyone in the room looks at you asks, "How'd they do that"? And, all you do is smile and say, "It's really easy if you think about it, but magicians can't tell." And you're really thinking "How the heck did they do that"?
You have your local magic shop on speed dial.
You can lose your thumb and you visit the magic shop instead of the emergency ward.
Your wife tells you "we are going out to dinner, now dear, please leave your toys at home".
You pay to see a lecture, buy a written version of what was just demonstrated to you, and then buy a manufactured version of something in the notes.
You pay $60.00 for a book and get, possibly, one or two useful things out of it and you're happy.
You have so much magic stuff in your room that its considered a fire hazard.
You are the only guy dragged into the women's clothing store and not bored to tears because you plant yourself in front of a mirror and check the angles on your coin moves.
You have more elastic bands than a stationary shop.
You spend hours trying to rearrange the letters in your name to use on stage (only to come back years later using your real name).
You tell people that you do "mind reading" and then ask what they do.
You bring your topit or pull to class on exam day incase you need to make an "emergency vanish".
You don't mind kissing a dove.
It really matters to you how someone shuffles your deck.
You have more sets of Handcuffs than the entire police department.
You expect people to think it's magic when it took you half an hour to set up.
You own a dozen thimbles and can't sew.
Your child constantly checks behind his ear for money when in a candy store.
You own a top hat, cape and cane and have never gone to the opera.
You began demonstrating the mysteries of ancient China at the age of 9.
When you come to visit, your friends hide all the silverware and bring out plastic ones.
Your Can of Soda keeps popping out, refilling and resealing itself.
Someone actually hands you a fork and says please bend this.
You say 'hows tricks?' to a friend and get a 2 hour lecture.
You ask every waitresses you meet "do you have a minute"
There's a pack of cards in sight as you read these words.
You pretended to be insane just to get the straight jacket.
You can say "I will now penetrate ..." with a straight face.
The talent show judges throw money into your hat.
"Bikes and Hos" is not a funny phrase to you.
You spend the most money on things that other people arent allowed to see.
The majority of your English papers are about magic.
You have one or more chipped teeth from biting the wrong quarter.
You never throw out old decks because you "can make something out of it".
You carefully watch a card-playing scene in a movie only to see what kind of cards theyre using.
Above was forwarded to me. Unsure of its source / origin ...