The Foo Can Convention

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Postby Ryan Matney » 04/15/02 11:30 PM

Hey All,

The Foo Can is having it's first annual convention. First Weekend of May. There will be an intense session following each lecture. Many groundbreaking methods and ideas will be shared. Some unpublished Vernon will be tipped.

Great performers are lined up. Each attendee will recieve a free video of the entire 2 day event, made by a professional production company.

Persi Diaconis has kindly donated all of his private notes to be issued as a gift. Everyone will be recieving a copy on him.

There will also be a surprise Lecture on Sat. night. I don't want to spoil it but his initials are R.J.

Live Band featuring Jim Steranko on Guitar and all the food you can eat. We have made special arrangments to keep the bar open all night. You won't be getting any sleep at this convention, not that you would want to.

Dealer section. Jeff Busby will be there will the complete file of The Braue notebooks and Dan Harlan with the final issue of "The Minotaur"
Busby will be making a large discount just for FooCanians.

Hope to see you there!
Ryan
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Postby Terry » 04/16/02 05:07 AM

Ryan,

Aren't you about 14 days late for this? :D
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Postby Guest » 04/16/02 07:39 AM

I thought this was a One-Day convention - held on April 1st! :p
Guest
 

Postby Guest » 04/16/02 08:49 AM

I hope this event is by invitation only :rolleyes:
Guest
 

Postby Ryan Matney » 04/16/02 09:00 AM

I hope this event is by invitation only
As a matter of fact, it is. Invitation only of course. You must also be over 18, Registered to vote, provide a full medical history and run a labyrinth designed by Martin Gardner in under 3 minutes. Failing that, you will be banned for life.

Just confimed the Juan Tamariz/Rene Levand midnite face off. Also David Copperfield will be giving a workshop on improvisation. A modern master of improv, This is by invitation only as well. You must be invited to the main convention and David must invite you to the workshop.

I suggest you just go ahead and pin your invitaion to your lapel so its in full view.
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Postby Guest » 04/16/02 09:06 AM

Lapel badge upside down maybe ?
Guest
 

Postby Bob Farmer » 04/16/02 10:57 AM

HOW YOU KNOW YOU'RE AT THE FOO CON by BOB FARMER (adapted from How You Know You're At A Bad Magic Convention)

Dealers room is located in an adjoining county.

Stack of signed organ donor cards at registration desk.

Magi-wives have extensive facial hair.

Late-arriving registrants are paying with live chickens.

On first night, man in polyester shirt emblazoned with playing cards and rabbits, sets fire to himself in lobby.

After wild night of drinking, you find yourself wearing a Charlotte Pendragon designer swimsuit.

Waitress at banquet is wearing a button that says, I survived a communicable disease.

There seem to be a preponderance of people wearing name-tags with only a scrawled X and the words, His mark.

Your reserved seat for the close-up show is in row ZZZ1469, level 10.

Jeff Busby is elected dealer of the year.

Your assigned roommate drools, drinks from the toilet, and after he hasnt moved from his bed for two days, you smell a strong odor of formaldehyde.

Lance Ito is judging the stage contest.

A chain reaction pile-up of hundreds of old people with walkers occurs after the smoke from bad Las Vegas illusion act floods exit routes.

The convention is being sponsored by the IBM Ring in Deliverance, Arkansas.

Doug Henning posters selling like wildfire.

Several performers lynched by overly-superstitious, God-fearing local folk.

During dealers show, gospel magicians spontaneously begin speaking in tongues and kissing poisonous snakes.

At new international convention in third-world, a guy at the night-before party tells you, In this country, the dung beetle is considered a delicacy.

Winner of young magicians contest is exposed as evil dwarf.

Kreskin cant find his cheque.

Local club members seem unfamiliar with simple cause-and-effect relationships like, Dont feed rabbit, rabbit die.

Lodge of Merlins new secret handshake qualifies as sodomy under state law.

Melindas Sorcery With Schnauzers is big hit.

Audience cowers after MC suggests shadow on curtain is really vision of Virgin Mary.

Goat of Wonder is best-selling dealer trick.

You win a gift certificate from Jeff Busby.

There are teeth marks on your ID badge.

You notice the chairman of the convention committee is using a rope to hold up his pants.

After you take notes at a lecture, people ask you to teach them to read and write.

Gospel magicians mock crucifixion goes terribly wrong.

Gold Cups are awarded to Buster, The Tap-Dancing Pig.

Jay Marshall closes Saturday night show with Righty.

Overly-energetic disco choreography results in performer impaled on Dancing Cane.

Primitive drawings of cave people and woolly mammoths on your hotel room wall.

Dove worker tells you, and then I swallow it whole.

Jeff Busby is only magic dealer.

Several Magi-gals are revealed to ACTUALLY be women.
Convention committee rolling naked in the mud with Ginsu knives.

You notice police marksmen in audience during opening speeches by local club poobahs.

At the end of overly complicated card trick, youre asked to say, I do, and only later discover youre now Mrs. Tom Mullica.

Jeff Busby asks you for your credit card number and you give it to him.

Mel Stover is driving the bus from the airport.

Magic Christian invades Poland.

Youre the only guy without a lapel bunny that lights up.

Crudely altered airline vomit containers being sold as Malini Egg Bag.

Johnny Ace Palmer finishes cup and ball routine with final production of cups of snot.

Gold Cups Prize is 12 lessons from David Blaine School of Magic.
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Postby Terry » 04/17/02 08:05 AM

On first night, man in polyester shirt emblazoned with playing cards and rabbits, sets fire to himself in lobby.
Talk about a melt down!

The convention is being sponsored by the IBM Ring in Deliverance, Arkansas.
Hot Dang! Whars my banjo

Local club members seem unfamiliar with simple cause-and-effect relationships like, Dont feed rabbit, rabbit die.
Served at Banquet prior to last evening show

Lodge of Merlins new secret handshake qualifies as sodomy under state law.
Get a grip on yourself, Bob

Overly-energetic disco choreography results in performer impaled on Dancing Cane.
Followed by a 20 minute standing ovation

Convention committee rolling naked in the mud with Ginsu knives.
Cool...didn't know they would be filming an episode of 'Fear Factor' that weekend.

You notice police marksmen in audience during opening speeches by local club poobahs.
Hired to protect paying audience from an abundance of dove, linking ring, and zombie freaks.
Terry
 
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Joined: 01/18/08 01:00 PM
Location: Kentucky


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