Actually that isn't the real title. It is the title given to it by the most irritating James Munton who has had the audacity to continually make derogatory remarks about this wonderful performance item of mine. Most ungrateful after my guidance and tuition got him a spot on television after I taught him hypnotism. As to the real title I have completely forgotten it and I consulted Edwin Hooper in the spirit world who first brought it out and he couldn't remember the title either. No doubt some know-all here will butt in and tell us what it is.
While I was chattering to Edwin he allowed me to give away the secret since he isn't selling it any more and it isn't much of a secret anyway. I must say that Edwin is far more affable in the spirit world than he was on earth.
The only trouble is that I can't remember the bloody routine properly. I haven't done if for ages but that is not a point for Munton even though he will claim it is.
I shall try my best to recall it though and may even add it back to my repertoire.
First you have to have a number of big cards with words imprinted upon them.And as I write this I think the awful title is coming back to me. Or at least I think it is the awful title. I say "awful" because it is the same name as the dreadful Sisti personage's magazine. The Magic Menu I kid you not.
One each card you have the words Sausage, Cheese and Biscuits, Meat and Veg, Fish, Soup. I keep wondering if I have missed out a
card with other food type words but the above seems fine.
You stack the cards. Now that I type this I am wondering if Edwin's version did not use cards after all but a book with the expressions on each page and you turn the page showing each food one at a time.
No matter. I shall continue. Stack the cards and show the word "Sausage" first. Ask the children what it says and if they have a British education they will be able to read it and say it out loud. If they merely have a Canadian education or even worse an American one they may not be sure what the word says so you will have to explain it to them.
Put the card at the back of the pile and show the next word or expression which is "Cheese and Biscuits" Say the word out loud. You don't have to get the kids to say it any more otherwise there is a danger that the trick will become more boring than the card trick described on another thread.Place this at the back of the stack.
The next expression is "Meat and Veg". Do the same. Now you show "Fish" and finally "Soup" By placing each card to the back of the stack you will finally end up back where you started. It is essential to use the sequence above.
You explain to the assembled brats that if you say the words twice quickly it will sound just like a train. And as I am typing this I am beginning to wonder if Munton is right after all. It does sound terribly childish I suppose. I will, however, press on. You go through the above procedure again but you get the kids to say each food item twice and if they do it at a snappy pace it will sound just like a train.
Try it for yourself. I get a vibe that there are juvenile minds on this forum. Here is the sequence. "Sausage, Sausage, Cheese and Biscuits, Cheese and Biscuits, Meat and Veg, Meat and Veg, Fish, Fish, Soup, Soup!" It is essential that you say "Soup" with a high pitched voice.
Damn! I have just remembered that the word "Coffee" should be in there somewhere. I think it is the first word. I am now wondering if the word "Sausage" was a figment of my imagination or if it should be placed in a different part of the sequence. Let me think for a moment.
I am pretty certain that "Cheese and Biscuits" comes after "Coffee" now but I have no idea where the bloody sausage fits into the picture. Maybe it wasn't there in the first place. I am inclined to say just leave out the word "Sausage" altogether and substitute the word "Coffee" instead.
I suppose I had better go back and ask Edwin again.
Meanwhile I do think that this item might be a good warm up in a children's show.
Oh do be quiet Munton.