From the "Science Glossary" in "I Am America, And So Can You" by Stephen Colbert:
My all-time favorite kind of science. It's mystical, entertaining, and you never know what's going to happen next. A physicist will tell you, 'It's impossible for that rabbit to be transported across the room into that hat'. But a magic scientist will get it done.
"The only problem I have with magic scientists is that they are not as forthcoming with information as some other scientists. If you meet a chemist in a bar, you can't get them to shut up about how to make different compounds out of common cleaning agents under your sink.
"Magic also has a much more practical application than the other sciences. I saw a magic scientist make an airplane disappear on TV. If we can move enough of those scientists onto the battlefield, imagine our army's easy victories as each enemy pilot sits on the ground, blinking in surprise that there's no plane around him anymore!"