Pitch DVD/Book course

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Pitch DVD/Book course

Postby performer » June 20th, 2016, 12:40 am

I rarely advertise my products on forums because I am far too busy annoying people to do so and I quite forget about it. And of course the more I annoy people the less they are going to buy anyway. This does not apply in the pitch business because for some odd reason the ruder you are to humanity at large the more likely they are to buy from you. I shall leave it to the psychologists to figure out why.

And this brings me to my product. It is not advertised on my website since I don't understand things like that and I consider such nonsense to be against the laws of nature.

I have a pitch course for sale. It consists of three ninety minute DVDs, Two entire books, one small manuscript and a partridge in a pear tree. However, sometimes the partridge is unavailable and if this is the case it will be a lesson for you all to be careful about purchasing things on the internet.

Anybody want to know any more about it, including the price and what it consists of? Actually it mainly consists of me but of course that is to be expected. I am sure there must be loads of starving magicians here who would be interested in making a bit of money selling magic to the unwashed public. I know I certainly have.

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Re: Pitch DVD/Book course

Postby Doug Thornton » June 20th, 2016, 6:48 am

Anybody want to know any more about it, including the price and what it consists of?

OK, Mark, tell us more.
Smiles all around
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Re: Pitch DVD/Book course

Postby performer » June 20th, 2016, 8:23 am

Too tired. I will later. Anybody else interested? More demand will exert me out of my inertia. No wonder I never promote my products. It is far too much effort and far less amusement.

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Re: Pitch DVD/Book course

Postby I.M. Magician » June 20th, 2016, 8:25 am

So you are offering a pitch course but don't feel like pitching it? Hmmm...

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Re: Pitch DVD/Book course

Postby performer » June 20th, 2016, 9:35 am

When it is perfectly obvious that I am the greatest svengali pitchman alive there should really no need to overly promote myself. Besides I am far too modest to brag about these matters. For the moment you can watch these two videos if you have not viewed them already. They have actually been put together from the course itself.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JxwujHN0w7s

And this one will give you an insight to my attitude towards customer service.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SCkXktFnUtw

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Re: Pitch DVD/Book course

Postby performer » June 20th, 2016, 2:42 pm

I suppose I had better exert myself in this matter before I fall asleep again. Old people need their rest. Anyway this is what the course consists of.

Three 90 minute DVDS. This explains the best way to pitch and make money. They describe pitch techniques such as gathering a crowd, the best places to work, the business end of pitching, a detailed explanation of the mechanics of the svengali deck plus the other best tricks for pitching and you will also see me pitching for a full 90 minutes or so in an amusement park.
PLUS:

The Long and the Short of It book. This is recognised as the finest book ever written on the Svengali Deck.

Marmaduke the Wonder Mouse book (complete with free mouse). A terrific pitch item. Here is a video of it in action. I have also included a description of the Squirmle which you can see in action in another video I am going to post.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KvU71dSPfwY


A set of the Dutch Looper card trick with photographic directions and a full manuscript on how to do it. This is one of my major pitch items and can be seen in the following video at one minute in.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z3GSItQV6io

I sell this complete course in pitching for $100 plus $15 for postage if you live in North America. $25 if you live elsewhere. If you already own either or both of the svengali or mouse books let me know and I will adjust the price accordingly and only send you what you need. You will probably earn the money back in about an hour or two of work then from that moment on it will be profit all the way.

I accept Paypal. If you wish to order contact me privately or you can find me at lewis086@sympatico.ca

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Re: Pitch DVD/Book course

Postby performer » June 21st, 2016, 9:41 am

I am gravely disappointed with the lack of response to my wonderful offer. You are all bloody useless and I knew I shouldn't have bothered exerting myself. I am going back to bed.

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Re: Pitch DVD/Book course

Postby I.M. Magician » June 23rd, 2016, 11:26 am

I like that tan backed Svengali deck with the blue square in the center you are using in the video demo.

What kind of deck is that? Brand and where they were made please. That is an unusual deck design.

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Re: Pitch DVD/Book course

Postby performer » June 23rd, 2016, 12:11 pm

Tan backed? Blue Square? Sorry. I am not sure what you mean. That doesn't seem to fit the description of the cards I was using. I don't think the decks in the video are particularly unusual or uncommon. As to their origin I think they are Chinese which I find ironic because the Chinese never buy anything from me. They are a bit like members of the Genii forum come to think of it.

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Re: Pitch DVD/Book course

Postby I.M. Magician » June 23rd, 2016, 12:15 pm

I am speaking of the deck you are using in this video. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z3GSItQV6io

Perhaps the camera work has distorted how they actually look.

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Re: Pitch DVD/Book course

Postby performer » June 23rd, 2016, 2:00 pm

They are the standard pitch svengali decks obtainable from the usual suppliers. I think it says "Empire" on the box. I don't particularly like them because they are a bit thick to use but they work well enough. You are probably not familiar with them because they are not the high quality card stock that most magicians use. Pitchmen never use bicycle cards or that kind of quality otherwise we would go broke very quickly. We all use cheap Chinese crap. It is all the punters deserve after all. Our attitude is that the stuff is only for buying and selling.

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Re: Pitch DVD/Book course

Postby I.M. Magician » June 23rd, 2016, 2:44 pm

I assumed they were pitch decks but looked different from all of the different ones I have seen. Thanks for the info!

Come to think of it, the only quality version of a Svengali Deck I have ever seen is Bicycle. You would think that Carta Munde or some other quality brand would have been made as a Svengali.

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Re: Pitch DVD/Book course

Postby I.M. Magician » June 23rd, 2016, 3:24 pm

I just found a Phoenix Svengali. So maybe there are others.

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Re: Pitch DVD/Book course

Postby observer » June 23rd, 2016, 4:56 pm

performer wrote: cheap Chinese crap. It is all the punters deserve after all.


No doubt, no doubt. Still, some people might be leery of purchasing items, sight unseen, from a seller who says so.

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Re: Pitch DVD/Book course

Postby performer » June 23rd, 2016, 6:09 pm

In that case they will never become a pitchman. You must learn to lie, cheat and steal in this line of work if you ate going to be succesful. It really is a job qualification you know.

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Re: Pitch DVD/Book course

Postby Ian Kendall » June 23rd, 2016, 7:05 pm

Heh. I know that when David Cronin trained me he bought the decks in for 10p each, and sold them for £2.99 - and that was in the mid 80s.

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Re: Pitch DVD/Book course

Postby performer » June 23rd, 2016, 7:45 pm

Ian Kendall wrote:Heh. I know that when David Cronin trained me he bought the decks in for 10p each, and sold them for £2.99 - and that was in the mid 80s.


Indeed. And HE was using the cheap chinese cards too. In Harrods no less. The poshest department store in the UK. To answer I.M. Magician there are in fact many brands of svengali decks out there. However, grafters (I hate that silly American world pitchmen) only use merchandise that they can purchase as cheaply as possibly. You HAVE to have very high mark up on products since there are a lot of other expenses such as hotels, travel, rental costs for where ever you happen to be working and sometimes even staff. You cannot work at magic shop mark ups otherwise you will go broke very quickly. One of my most popular products is a single playing card. It doesn't do a thing but I do put a psychic blessing on it and promise the punter it will bring them good luck. I must say the cost of the merchandise is quite appealing.

However, in my life I did sell one good quality svengali deck. The last time I saw one it was selling in an antique shop for $25.
A lovely deck with a picture of a cowboy on it. I still have one or two of them for sentimental reasons.

If I were selling a bicycle deck I would heavily imply to the punters that it was an official magic product put out by the people who make bicycle playing cards. You have to have this street wise mentality if you are going to survive. That is why most magicians who try this business find it difficult to succeed. They don't have the stamina and most important of all they don't have the correct mentality.

I do teach my evil ways on the DVDs though. If you are unethical enough you should succeed. And magicians are renowned for their lack of ethics so there should be some takers here.

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Re: Pitch DVD/Book course

Postby performer » June 23rd, 2016, 7:49 pm

The worst quality cards I ever sold were from India. Unbelievably thin. They were so bad it was hilarious! They were actually transparent! You could see the face of the card just looking through the back. Alas they were so horrifically bad that even I with my elastic conscience didn't dare sell them. Luckily they were so cheap that I simply cut them all up and made them into Dutch Loopers.

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Re: Pitch DVD/Book course

Postby chetday » June 24th, 2016, 5:10 pm

Mark, I've been thinking for years about demoing and trying to sell magic worms at flea markets as well as in front of lady lingerie shops, but up until I retired didn't have the time to give it a go. With that said, I wouldn't mind supplementing the pauper's retirement income the old lady and I are living on now, but I'm not sure pitching magic worms will generate enough coin to make up for the aggravation of dealing with the public.

I have turned in many respects into a grumpy old man with a low opinion about humanity in general, so perhaps I have the right attitude for this kind of work.

In closing, pitching appears to have provided you with a lucrative retirement and life of leisure during your golden years, so perhaps I should buy your course and give it a go?

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Re: Pitch DVD/Book course

Postby I.M. Magician » June 24th, 2016, 5:28 pm

Well, how do you like that? It appears that we found Mark's long lost twin brother! :lol:

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Re: Pitch DVD/Book course

Postby performer » June 24th, 2016, 8:35 pm

Excellent attitude Chet. I must congratulate you on being far more astute in these matters than this daft useless bunch here.
However, I am not quite sure that working in front of ladies lingerie shops are the best locations but perhaps you know something I don't.

I shall give you a little advice on the matter though. For the worm you really need good traffic flow. That is, if you are doing it on its own with no other product. You really need lots of people. Many grafters have done the worm on it's own but they have to do it with a lot of people around.

The svengali deck is different. The traffic flow can be a little quieter and in fact I have taken good money with the deck when there has been surprisingly low traffic. This may well be because there is more pressure on the punter when there is a quieter atmosphere and they are not rushing about so much. But of course the deck works well with high traffic around also.

The best way is probably to do both.

One word of warning though. If you are of retirement age it is worth noting that this can be quite hard work. Do not feel that you have to stand all day. You don't. I often pitch sitting down. It doesn't make the blindest bit of difference to sales. And do not listen to the twaddle you will hear that you have to stand up on a rostrum so everyone can see you. You don't. I never have.

Flea markets are good but make sure you choose the right flea market. Avoid markets where the demographics are too ethnic. I do not wish to sound like Donald Trump here but business is business. If the majority of potential punters are Chinese, Indian, or Pakistanis you won't sell a thing. African Americans are great though. You want your customers to be very black or very white. All the funny colours in between tend not to be good punters.

I am not sure about Mexicans though. I suspect they might be very good indeed. A friend of mine took in a fortune at a flea market in America filled with Mexicans. I myself took in great money outside Wembley Stadium in the UK when Mexico was playing England. The Brits were bloody awful but as soon as I saw a sombrero I got all excited and the Mexicans threw money at me like there was no tomorrow. Of course they were on holiday and that might have had something to do with it.
Even Canadians spend money on holiday although they are bloody useless in their own country. Still, I used to sell 200 decks a day at Christmas in Toronto on a regular basis.

Mind you the Irish were far better. I would sell an average of 400 decks a day in Dublin at Christmas. They would get their money out in the middle of the demonstration.

Yes indeed. I most certainly think you have the right attitude for this work. Learn to snarl at the customers in the appropriate manner when they complain they can't do the tricks and you will do very well indeed.

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Re: Pitch DVD/Book course

Postby chetday » June 26th, 2016, 11:07 am

Mark, thank you for the helpful response. I'm going to ponder all this for a bit and also do some research on available places where I could try my hand at pitching. My fear after reading your most recent post is that I'd have to spend a lot of time in the car to get to venues where there would be sufficient numbers of people to potentially earn a few dollars. Given that I hate driving a car these days almost as much as I hate hot weather and cold women, I'm cooling on the idea of trying my hand at pitching.

As far as this kind of work goes, the blushing bride of 40+ years and I live in a small town where many residents are illiterate or out of work or, in too many cases near as I can tell, both. So my original thought of demoing magic worms and perhaps Svengali decks locally no longer makes any sense. Also, there are no upscale (or downscale for that matter) lingerie shops in our town, so finding a nearby spot trafficked by people with money is problematic at best. The snobbish country club's a possibility, but I fear the management there would run me off, perhaps even treating me as an unwashed nuisance.

And, sadly, though in my youth I was known to wear a sombrero when I was still tipping the barley, I fear I may well be the only human with at least some Irish genes within 100 miles. Thus the financial opportunities associated with ethnic origin of the available populace seem dim indeed. Sigh...

In any event, I appreciate your useful reply above and again thank you for it.

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Re: Pitch DVD/Book course

Postby performer » June 26th, 2016, 11:41 am

Chet, don't they have flea markets where you live? Or festivals? Street events? Oh, and I have never driven a car in my life on the basis that I don't understand complicated things like that. It hasn't stopped me from travelling the world though. In any event you don't have to travel too far.

If people are out of work and miserable where you are they will be ripe for magic and a bit of fun to distract them from their misery. You probably shouldn't sell the worm on its own unless there are lots of kids about and a reasonable traffic venue.

However, who says you have to sell worms anyway? It is a great product but there are other alternatives. If the populace are as poverty stricken as you say then what you do is offer what is known as a "lump up". I do it frequently in tough places. That is you appear to be giving them a bargain by "lumping up" a whole bunch of other stuff on top of the svengali deck in a package deal. I am doing it in this video that I already posted:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JxwujHN0w7s

One advantage of the svengali deck is that it can be sold not just to kids but adults, particularly men. Women will buy it for their kids but men will buy it for their own use. The worm is just for kids. And the "lump up" is a good option for those people who don't have a lot of money since you sell the whole thing for $10. In fact you can just sell the svengali deck on its own for a lousy $5 if the populace have no money. You can't do this in Canada because it cost so much to bring the decks in here but you can certainly do it in the US. But only if you have to because people don't have the money.

Incidentally I am getting a vibe that you are under the impression that svengali pitchmen just set down a table and work without permission a bit like a busker. Maybe that is where you got the lingerie shop idea. That is called "flypitching" and it is rarely done in that way. You usually have to pay for a spot but you can bargain the price down or even get it free because you are offering entertainment. Expect to pay something but you will make up for it in sales.

All this is explained in my DVD course. And even if you never sell a single deck in your life the DVDs will give you good entertainment if nothing else since I am a most amusing personality particularly when I am advising on how to scam the public and break the hearts of children by selling them tricks that they will never be able to do. And the techniques used for selling make you a damn good magician too so it is useful in that sense. And even learning the pitch items as magic tricks to show people makes it worth it since they are damn good routines in their own right.


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